Sunday, July 4, 2010

Chow time!

My first handmade potato salad and the counter it sits on. 

I made potato salad today.  (Cheers,  applause, I take my bow.)  For the first time, ever.  (More cheers, louder applause)  I'd forgotten how much I look to cook.  Between my husband not being around for dinner (except maybe on weekends) and my depression looming over me, I've done very little in the last few years.  I had almost completely forgotten how much I love it.  My "career" since high school has been working in restaurants.  The last place was a cafe, where they made almost everything from scratch.  Every salad on the buffet was handmade, all the soups, every special, the main dishes and every dessert.  I learned a lot from that place, like how to make pudding without a box!  It was one of my favorite jobs.  I still have thoughts of having my own restaurant, a Mexican one, from scratch.  (My favorite food) 

OK, no one's going to be beating down my door for my potato salad, but all the same my husband and I are going to enjoy it.  What better summer food.  It was easy to make and I enjoyed doing it.  I just can't believe how much I"d forgotten that.  I've been depriving myself of the fun and I love to cook.  Why would I take that away from myself?  Oh, that's right, because I had a 2-ton anvil on my head making it difficult to breathe much less move.  And for some reason I didn't really care about myself or anything else.  I feel like I've woke up from a coma into a whole new world about myself. 

I discovered I had a kitchen island counter that I didn't know existed anymore.  I can't believe it didn't collapse under the weight of being a "catch-all."  I've been trying to figure out how to find the counter for 2 months, and could only find half before giving up!  lol  One thing I have been doing is trying to keep up on things around the house, despite my depression and it sure has paid off.  So much easier to clean when it's kept up and faster!  I know, like these are really new words of wisdom, lol.  I'm actually following through on my decisions of what I want.  No matter how I feel, though on my down days, I do what I can and leave the rest.  It has been really cool.  OK, what kind of thrills do you expect get from a blogging bipolar housewife!!!  I felt like I'd been living on the edge of death for the few weeks or so, dark thought, dark moods and now I feel light I've been hit with a blast of light.  (or maybe it was a 2x4 on the back of the head!!)  Either way I'll take it.      


Emeila said...

This blog you seem happier. Your potato salad looks yummy. Strength and hugs to.

midnight rainbow said...

Thanks Emeila, I do feel happier. My mood feels like it is starting to stablize. Strength and hugs to you.